OLDER, WISER and still COOKING on gas.
So I’m sitting in a weekly Advertising status meeting this morning with miscellaneous colleagues, advertising types from Jupiter Drawing Room, media types and creatives (they stand out like a worm in a chicken farm – their Soviet Jean’s barely cover the cracks of their arses. Not very corporate dahling!). I’m half asleep, cold, it’s way to early for me (it’s what happens when you forego the customary morning walk) and I’m only on my third cup of coffee…when in walks this gorgeous young thing. Bright eyed and skin fresh as the morning dew. Beautiful peaches and cream blush on her apple cheeks and the sweetest little smile. I smile back (read: bare fangs – not in malice or envy though, I just don’t do the happy smiley thing in the morning). My colleague sitting next to me (married, 2.5 kids and the mortgage and mommy car to prove it) eye’s the newcomer enviously, looks over to me and remarks -wait for it…-, “(big dramatic sigh) That use to be us. Don’t you miss those years?”.
WTF was she trying to say!? Is she trying to imply that I’m (gasp) “old”. That (bigger gasp) I LOOK old? Or, is it because I`m of a certain age, I get lumped into the “us” even though I`m still hip and freaking happening? Grrrrrrr
And, guys, here`s the thing. Women get old. Men get hot. There`s just no getting away from it. I adore older men. I often date older men (and usually dating my peers have only ended in disaster men are such freaking babies when they`re younger). And if I really had to think hard about what makes the older man tickâ€¦what it is about them that gets my motor revving and I MEAN revving it`s just possible that in order to have sex appeal you need to have confidence, and there`s nothing like the confidence of an older men.
WOMEN DIG them, men envy them and they make ageing seem a cosmic joke. I just can`t get enough of them. They get better and better as the years pass and there`s no cosmetic surgery or obsessive botoxing just good old testosterone. Guys like Harrison Ford, Bill Clinton, Richard Gere and that seductive Scot, Sean Connery perennially have women swooning in (and out of) their pants. Case in point: I met Bill Clinton last year and, although I never thought much of him before, I was about ready to say, Hey Mr. Ex-President, can I be your intern? by the time he left. So, besides the sophisticated charm and physical characteristics of graying sideburns, salt and pepper highlights and in some cases (hello, Jack Nicholson!), a stomach with a balcony, what is it that makes older men such hot property with younger women?
DADDY`S LITTLE GIRL…
The father of sexual psychology, Dr. Sigmund Freud`s theory of the Electra Complex, explains a condition, which is experienced by young girls during their developmental stages, that causes them to form a strong attraction to their fathers. Friends and especially family members, find it hard to understand why their young/sweet/innocent/nubile daughter has chosen to date an â€˜old geezer`. Apparently women who are attracted to older men fall into two categories: They either had a doting father who frequently told them how cute they were and they want a lover who will do the same, or they never had that kind of attention and are desperate for it. It could also be due to the fact that older men are more settled and secure financially, and, hence, provide materialistic comforts and gratification easily.
Uhâ€¦NO. That`s not it. I have never expected or wanted a sugar daddy what crap! I look after myself financially and emotionally. I don`t need a daddy to tell me how pretty I am. I know who I am and what I`m capable off (besides, I clean up good). In fact, what relationships with Older Men have taught me is to be confident about your appearance, your capabilities and your ability to stay grounded.
So, I`m thinking my attraction lies in the fact that …
OLDER MEN ARE MORE SORTED…
Let`s face it: Besides the above complexities, men in their twenties have very different priorities to men in their thirties and forties. Hence â€˜seasoned` men are often more mature. Twenty-something guys are still searching for who they are, and how to pull the next sweet young thing. Sex, money, material possessions, sports and status are their primary interests. Their â€˜me` mentality has not yet matured into a â€˜we` philosophy. For older men, by their late thirties, most know who they are or who they are not. Many are in the second or third phases of their careers and have learned that there is more to life than money, sex and prestige. They`re also more discreet, as compared to the young stud who needs to boast to his soccer buddies the morning after. They know how to physically, emotionally and intellectually satisfy a woman and don`t try too hard to do it. And while younger men see women as being there for them, older men take personal pride in dating and â€˜connecting` with them on their own level. My personal favourite is the fact that older men have less Drama Queen moments and have probably dealt with or made peace with their issues. And then there`s the space thing. You get OODLES of it. An older guy won`t breath down your neck. He understands the need for me time, because he wants it to and it doesn`t lead to any insecurity.
Older men come with physical, emotional and mental maturity. In fact, I`ve never been able see a guy my age. Never say never they say, but I`m still not sure I will. You`re accustomed to a certain level of maturity in your relationships and become increasingly unwilling to compromise.
So, is it Lolita speaking? I don`t know. Despite what my colleague said this morning, I`m only 28. Some days I feel as old as Pandora but I`ve always been an old soul. For all other extents and purposes, I`m still able to hold my own in the urban rat race and look forward to many more years of being a sexy, young chick about town.
Eventually, love knows no sex (except the good kind, I suppose), racial barriers or age limits. As a noble mind once said, Better be an old man`s darling than a young man`s slave.
Women get old. Men get hot. And someâ€¦.like it hot.