An open letter to British Eddie

Background: What do you say to your crush? You`re not sure how you really really feel…but you hate the fact that you might not be getting the opportunity to find out. And then you go away for a while and meet another Eddie, who just happens to be half British / Half SAFA as well. And he reminds you so much of his alter ego back home and you end up missing the crush too much. And it`s a bit of a reminder that you might be losing out on something. So, you come back to Cape Town and the sore reminder is that the REAL British Eddie is still here. But he`s not ACTUALLY making any move.

Dear British Eddie, I like you and would, if it is alright with you, like to get to know you much better. Alternatively, I’d be ok with only making out too. You see, British Eddie, the whole British stiff-upper-lip is really starting to work on my nerves. Can’t you just lie down and think of England? Would it be that hard? Figuratively speaking, of course…

Anyway, I digress. All the bloody hinting about how you like me, buying me biltong (very original – beats flowers hands down) and saying we should get together for a drink sometime is all a bit confusing. You see, buying a girl biltong is a big thing where I come from and you should take care not to lead me on with dried spiced meat. It’s just wrong. So, British Eddie…when next you say, ” I like you, can I proposition you” I won’t just laugh it off because I think we’re both a bit wasted on red wine and you must be making a joke. I nearly kicked myself the next day when I realised I had possibly let an opportunity slide. British Eddie, please feel free to proposition me at ANY time. I will not laugh it off. I’ll probably jump you. I’ll even make you tea.


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